“That Bloody book”

I took a break from blogs with the idea that I would “collate my notes” to write and publish a book on Tarot.

It started well, early mornings with coffee, happily writing away. A beautiful flow of words (very much in Empress mode), as I explored Tarot, my experience with Tarot, and a few reflections on my life.

After a few weeks I was astonished to find roughly 80 thousand words, and I sent various chapters off to Beta readers, students, and friends for feedback. The main response surprised me- readers seemed to want a more personal narrative about my life woven in to the book. I had definitely used the book as a cathartic experience and had poured my heart out about the horrendous end to my marriage, colliding with the first Covid lock down (now re-written to a much more appropriate tone). But any book I write about tarot will have to link in places to the runes, and my personal practice of Norse shamanism, and my original readers wanted this explored as a narrative- not odd disjointed reflections.

So I moved into Emperor/8 of pentacles (defiantly not a place of comfort for me) to re-structure the book, and create a cohesive whole.

As I look at my word count right now and see just over 200 words, it puts into perspective just what I have taken on. Nearing 100 thousand words my book is the largest project I have ever taken on.

With my blogs I have tended to write as I speak, and do smaller “in the moment” pieces which suits my knight of wands “just get it done” personality. The level of planning, editing, and attention to detail needed to proof read, edit, and create a cohesive book is something I had not fully appreciated at the start of the project.

I am a single Mum of four kids, and the sole wage earner based on my tarot/shamanic work- so kids and clients come first, with my book squeezed into early mornings, or late nights after Walking Dead with my teens. (I love and hate that series in equal measure, but my teens are obsessed and I enjoy the family time). If I had understood how hard the editing would be I doubt I would have started the project, but as I work though and tie up loose ends I am slowly starting to see the final shape of the book.

I am writing this blog as a gift to myself, squeezed in after dropping my daughter at college and before my client- to remind myself of the pleasure of writing a quick blog. In the moment. When the book is done (hopefully in October ) I will be so pleased to have a chance to write more “in the moment” blogs. Until then every spare moment is that "bloody book",