When the client says "you are wrong, that is just not right"
I had a reading the other day, and I felt the cards were very clear. My client was being run ragged by her friends needs and clearly needed to redefine her relationships.
She was very clear in her answer "absolutely not"
This is one example, but it happens a lot. I see a clear reading, which my client then completely denies.
The main reason being, often Tarot readings are reaching into someone's shadow. And the whole point about shadow is-it is something they are choosing not to recognize.
I've even had a fair amount of anger from clients, especially if they have come to me about a relationship and I dare to suggest they need to look at their own behavior as well as their partners! They have pushed all their own responsibility for relationship difficulties deep into their shadow, and do not want to be reminded about that.
Here are my 5 top tips for dealing with a client (paid or unpaid) who simply says "no" to a reading.
#1 Always check in with your own intuition. It is possible that your mind wondered during the reading, & the client is right.
Whenever a client disagrees with a reading I always pause and check in. Some times my mind has not been focused, other times the reading has picked up on some-one the client is really focused upon.
Usually the cards are spot on- my client hasn't recognized it.
#2 Tread softly. If you have hit a real block in a clients shadow- then it is there for a reason. My understanding is that we create blocks at time of stress to survive difficulties, then carry on not even realising they are there. It can cause a lot of psychological stress to highlight a block if a client isn't ready to deal with it.
I will gently repeat what the cards have told me, and explain it can take a while for the full meaning of a reading to sink in. Which is exactly what I find often happens. My suggestions have gently opened the possibility- often a client will go away read books, talk to friends, and gradually realise the depth of the block in their own good time.
I do not use shock tactics, nor insist I am right.
#3 Turn to the cards for clarification. If a client firmly says "no" to something the cards have told me I leave the spread out & shuffle my second deck to ask for clarification. I may lay just three cards and ask "have I missed something" or "how can I best help this client right now" or I may lay the same spread for the same question and see if I get a similar answer.
But if I'm in doubt- I always the ask the cards. I do not wrangle with a client or bring my opinion in. My focus is always on the Tarot cards.
#4 I offer a client ways to resolve the issue & investigate further. If a client disagrees with my reading, and I am certain the reading is correct I will offer a client further ways to explore the issue.
This may be books to read, other professionals for counselling or healing, or a practical way to try out my concept for themselves. I find this a very useful way to help clients that can almost see the truth in my readings- but need a little "proof" (and I really don't blame them for this)
With the case I mentioned at the start I suggested the lady used a diary. That she booked in her diary the things that were important to her & then when her friends rang with their requests for help she could check her diary and point out she already had something on (if she did!) She agreed to give this a go, and felt it would help her understand where her time went if she kept a log of what she did.
I based this advice on a mini-reading I did askiing to how to best manage the situation; ace of swords, 4 of swords, 10 of swords. I often see a sword dominated reading as using pen & paper to get to the bottom of an issue.
#5 I always start with a reading that reflects the current situation. This allows a client to find some truth in my reading. After all if I start with predicting the future, neither of us knows I have formed any connection or am using any insight at all!
I find it very difficult to dive straight into the deep emotional stuff of a reading, a trust needs to be built between me & the client- and starting with what's happening right now is a great way to do this.
Starting with a "what's going on now" reading allows me to accurately reflect what is happening in a clients life, and for the client to say "yes" at least to that part of the reading. This means when I start to look at shadow or future stuff, where the client may not be able to validate the reading- I have already built a little trust .
I often think that after skill, trust is the most important part of a Tarot reading.